There Will Be No Nursing Home In My Future

When I get old and feeble, I am going to get on a Princess Cruise Ship.

The average cost for a nursing home is $200 per day. I have checked
on reservations at Princess and I can get a long term discount and
senior discount price of $135 per day. That leaves $65 a day for:

1. Gratuities which will only be $10 per day.

2. I will have as many as 10 meals a day if I can waddle to the
restaurant, or I can have room service ( which means I can have
breakfast in bed every day of the week).

3. Princess has as many as three swimming pools, a workout room,
free washers and dryers, and shows every night.

4. They have free toothpaste and razors, and free soap and shampoo.

5. They will even treat you like a customer, not a patient. An
extra $5 worth of tips will have the entire staff scrambling to help
you.

6. I will get to meet new people every 7or 14 days.

7. T.V. broken? Light bulb need changing? Need to have the
mattress replaced? No Problem! They will fix everything and
apologize for your inconvenience.

8. Clean sheets and towels every day, and you don't even have to
ask for them.

9. If you fall in the nursing home and break a hip you are on
Medicare.
If you fall and break a hip on the Princess ship they will upgrade
you to a suite for the rest of your life.

Now hold on for the best! Do you want to see South America, the
Panama Canal, Tahiti, Australia, New Zealand, Asia, or name where you
want to go?
Princess will have a ship ready to go. So don't look for me in a
nursing home, just call shore to ship.

P.S. And don't forget, when you die, they just dump you over the
side at no charge.

(None of this hasn't been verified with Princess Cruises)